Now, it does not please me to say that I was making my core video store memories in more like the early 2000s. But hear me out on the year 1988.
I saw many a tweet top of year saying that “wow, this year alone we’re getting a new Wes Anderson, Greta Gerwig, Christopher Nolan, M. Night Shyamalan, Kelly Reichardt, and Denis Villeneuve.” Sure, we are spoiled. Now what if I told you that 1988 audiences got a new — John Waters, Sidney Lumet, Martin Scorsese, Spike Lee, Wes Craven, John Hughes, Tim Burton, Penny Marshall, John Landis, and David Cronenberg?
As a spoiler, none of the above directors’ films are making my Staff Picks — frankly because this year was so full of good stuff. But I have tried to offer a nice variety for whatever you fancy. Buddy comedy? Rom-com? Spooky scary? All here. So take a stroll down those blue carpeted aisles, eye those Red Vines, get jumpscared by the ‘Evil Dead 2’ VHS cover. Here are my picks off the shelf in 1988.
5.) The Blob (dir. Chuck Russell)
My one regret about the ‘Blob’ remake is that it didn’t get a dope Burt Bacharach theme song like the 1958 original did. But in practically every other way, I’d call it an upgrade.
In 1958, it was the age of the drive-in and alien paranoia, when we had grand dreams of having families and going to other worlds. Hence, a blob crashing down from space and destroying everything we held sacred. In 1988, Ronald Reagan was President. As such, the 1988 blob is a government experiment, a stand-in for state conspiracy. They weren’t just throwing a bunch of slime at the walls!
And the more fun, much less depressing case for this pick? It’s absolutely disgusting. The titular blob is not only pink this time, but also ten thousand times more unforgiving, attacking phone booths and sucking people into drains left and right. It’s gooier and grosser, courtesy of makeup / effects legend Tony Gardner. That’s all I want out of these later creature features: a bucket of popcorn and a big, slimy monster swallowing up the screen.
4.) Crossing Delancey (dir. Joan Micklin Silver)
Many a listicle has been written about the best rom-com love interests. Some votes go to best-friend-goes-boyfriend Mark Ruffalo in ‘13 Going on 30,’ some go to Colin Firth’s grumpy Mr. Darcy in ‘Bridget Jones’ Diary.’ My vote is for pickle man Peter Riegert in ‘Crossing Delancey.’ Because let me tell you: if a pickle man told me a silly little story about a hat and then mailed me said hat, I’d be married to a pickle man.
This concept is simply not appealing to our leading lady, Isabelle (Amy Irving) — at first. She’s a bookshop worker hoping to leave behind her traditional Jewish upbringing. This includes: spending time with intellectuals on the Upper West Side, and not dating working class men who make pickles on the Lower East Side and are friendly with her bubbe. Isabelle does eventually warm up to Sam (Reigert), but like so many of us do when we’re searching for what we want, she fumbles on the way to romance. Meanwhile all we want them to do is stop playing and have a smooch.
As Joan Micklin Silver was so wonderful at infusing in all of her films (which I also recommend), ‘Crossing Delancey’ possesses a rare empathy for her characters, even when they don’t get it right.
3.) Stand and Deliver (dir. Ramón Menéndez)
‘Stand and Deliver’ tells the real life story of East LA teacher Jaime Escalante (Edward James Olmos, donning a dashing combover) and his math students. Most of them are from working-class Latino families, some of them are in gangs, all of them have been told they have no potential. In the face of the school administration’s ridicule, Mr. Escalante is determined to teach the students calculus — if only to make them feel possible.
Growing up I assumed every schoolkid watched ‘Stand and Deliver’ whenever there was a substitute teacher. It wasn’t until I moved away from California that I realized this was a regional pick, a VHS tape only SoCal teachers had on standby. It tracked. The students looked like me and a lot of the kids in my schools through the years — Mexican American, from working families, and may or may not have hated math.
And while I (humblebrag) did make it through two years of calculus, I’ll never pass up an opportunity to recommend the story of Mr. Escalante to those who didn’t get to experience it with their chins on a school desk.
2.) Midnight Run (dir. Martin Brest)
Martin Brest really nailed the ‘80s. In 1984, he directed ‘Beverly Hills Cop,’ the platonic ideal of an action movie featuring inventor-of-charisma Eddie Murphy. And then in 1988, he directed this core “they’re just not makin’ ‘em like they used to” movie, featuring what is for my money Robert De Niro’s finest work.
‘Midnight Run’ is a take on the odd couple trope, a delightful meeting of two pains in the ass. De Niro plays Jack Walsh, a bitter bounty hunter who takes on what initially seems to be an easy job: bring embezzling accountant Jonathan “The Duke” Mardukas (Charles Grodin) back to LA in 5 days, and get the reward. The problem is this “Duke” is not only a damn nuisance, but he’s also clever enough to go toe-to-toe with Jack. The chemistry between the boys is key, with them somehow both playing the straight man, but what Brest nails is the masterful blending of action sequences, road trip antics, and buddy moments both comedic and heartfelt. It’s the definition of a good time.
And I mean what I said about De Niro’s performance by the way. He has line readings that I think about once a week. And opposite the man Charles Grodin? That’s no small feat.
1.) Who Framed Roger Rabbit (dir. Robert Zemeckis)
I’ve often tried to play out how ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit’ might’ve come to be. I guess fresh off of ‘Back to the Future,’ any suit would write a blank check for the next Spielberg-Zemeckis collaboration. But every time I see that creep Baby Herman or lady Jessica Rabbit, I ask myself: “now how did this happen?”
The pitch: “a ‘Chinatown’-style noir starring a cartoon rabbit who’s framed for murdering his busty human wife’s maybe-lover. It’s an anti-corporation send-up of Hollywood, part live action, part animation. Mickey Mouse and Bugs Bunny will get a scene together. Steven Spielberg will produce. And also Disney, who will make a theme park ride and highly coveted merch out of it.” Deal.
Against all odds, if there ever were any, the resulting film is in many ways groundbreaking, featuring literally eye-popping animation and visual effects. It’s glorious. It’s impossible. It’s miracle shit.
We will have more trips to the video store soon, and remember to make it s a BLOCKBUSTER NIGHT! Or go find your local indie store that is keeping physical media alive and support the hell out of them!
